My arch nemesis…..

Two things I thought when I walked outside this morning…..

1. It feels warm today! It’s 33 degrees outside. Do you know how depressing that is????

2. I LOVE the sound of melting snow. It actually makes me feel a little evil. Like…heeheehee…the snow thought it was going to get us but now it’s melting…melting…bahahahahahaha! (In my evilest laugh possible) I kind of see it like I am Superman and snow is my Lex Luther! Arch enemies to the end. Ok, maybe that is a little extreme but seriously I hate this crap and could not be happier to hear that drip, drip, drip that indicates it will soon be GONE and warmer weather is coming!! In my perfect world 50 degrees isn’t warm but compared to -7 it’s a freaking heat wave!

I have always hated winter but I hate this winter more than I normally do. I’m not really sure why. Maybe it’s because it makes everything so much more difficult and because me, Jim, Tyler, Aaron and Bennett are always stuck in our house, bored, staring at each other….and in turn my house is always a mess and I don’t feel like doing anything other than napping and reading so house cleaning is out. By spring we will be on one of those house cleaning shows where the British women show up with their rubber gloves and petri dishes. And to top it all off….I am wearing SOCKS! I even wore shoes to work every day this week. I took them off as soon as I walked in the door but still. Even my boss today said it was sad that I was wearing socks again because she knows this NEVER happens.

Winter just makes me sad. It’s so dark and gray. I don’t understand people when they say they love winter. It makes no sense to me. How can you love something that is dark, cold and gray all the time. Yuck. Maybe those people are vampires….there’s an idea! Give me some sun, warmth, flip flops…… I am ready to kick my kid, “husband” (for lack of a better word) and 150lb dog out of my house without them dragging in enough snow to make a river in my kitchen or having to spend 20 minutes bundling and then arguing with Tyler while he screams “NO HAT!!” at the top of his lungs.

There are a few things I actually like about this time of year though (only a few and I had to think REALLY hard)….blankets, coffee, soup, football sundays, and cuddling. Yep, that’s it. And all of those things I would rather do in the SUMMER!!!! 🙂

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7,224 Blog Views??

I started this blog 5 years ago when life was going to hell all around me and I needed an outlet. I like to write, I always have but I never really thought anyone would want to read what I had to say (except my mom of course). I was thinking about my blog today and that I hadn’t written anything in a while, so I logged on and guess what???

My blog has had 7,224 views! Holy smokes! I know that is not a lot, really, but it is for me. I never expected anyone to read my blog it was just something I started for fun. I’m glad people are reading it. One of the things I enjoy the most about this whole facebook/twitter era is that people are blogging. I love reading them because it makes you realize you aren’t alone. Other people are going through the same crap you are. I like reading blogs and thinking “Oh thank god. I thought it was just me!”

I read a lot of blogs about parenting. I think today’s society makes it so that women feel like they need to have it together all the time. You have to have a career, perfect children, do pinterest projects and eat organic foods, have a spotless house and never have a hair out of place. I feel that pressure. It’s pressure we really put on ourselves to be the perfect parent/spouse/career woman. I like reading blogs about moms who don’t have it all together and who struggle with temper tantrums, messy houses, exhaustion and feeling like they have lost themselves somewhere along the way. It makes me feel like we are all really going through the same things and that makes it easier.

I am really going to try to write in my blog more often. It is something I really enjoy whether people read it or not. I know I will have a lot of “mommy posts” since that’s what my life is about right now. But I am hoping to throw some non-child related ones in there as well. 🙂

I hope everyone had great holidays and a wonderful new years!

 

Being a “Mommy”

Becoming a parents isn’t always something people choose. Sometimes it’s a pleasant surprise and sometimes not so pleasant but no matter how you become a parent it is life changing. No one knows what it is like to be a mother or father until you become one. I know that statement is annoying for people who don’t have kids. Believe me it used to annoy me. But it is true.

I always knew I wanted to be a mom and if I had, had my way I would have become one a lot sooner. I am glad that I didn’t though. I had Tyler at just the right time in my life. I had made mistakes, been selfish, had a lot of fun and was ready to put someone before myself. I just didn’t know that until he was here.

When I was pregnant with Tyler I was secretly terrified. I was afraid that I wouldn’t like being a Mom. I was afraid I would have no time for myself. And you know what? I have no time for myself, I’m tired all the time and my house is always a mess but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Now Jim and I sit on the floor and watch Tyler play and wonder what we did before this little miracle came into our lives. I am not going to try to fool you, there are times that being a parent is truly demanding and disgusting and exhausting. Like when you are woken up at 3:00am and 4:00am and 5:00am…..I have had my not so fabulous Mommy moments where I stand over the crib and beg for a few uninterrupted hours of sleep. I’ve been puked on, peed on, wiped snot with my fingers, not unlike all the other mothers out there.

But it is also the most rewarding, wonderful, life altering thing that has ever happened to me. It is overwhelming how much I love that little boy. It has changed who I am. It’s not about me anymore it’s about him. I could never have imagined feeling this way. I love being a mom. I love being silly with him and teaching him things and watching him learn and explore. Every new thing he learns makes me so proud. I will never get enough of him. I wish he would stay little like this forever. I have absolutely no interest in him growing up. Unfortunately, I don’t think he is going to cooperate with me.

It makes me sad when I see children who are not loved the way they should be. Every child deserves a family that loves them. Every child deserves to have parents who bore people with a million pictures and stories about them.

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I think every parents worst fear is that they are doing it all wrong. I know that’s mine. I want so badly to raise Tyler the right way. To teach him respect, so many kids are lacking respect these days. I want him to play outside and use his imagination like we did before xbox and PlayStation. But most of all I want him to be happy.

I know some parents have big dreams for there kids, they want them to be doctors or lawyers….I want him to be happy and I want him to know I will always be there for him. Nothing he could ever do will ever change that. That is one thing my Mom has given to my sister and I. We both know that no matter what she is always there for us. I speak for both of us when I say we are so grateful to her for that.

Thanks mom for always giving us the bread. 🙂

 

 

Guardian Angels

I am not one who typically believes in “ghosts” neccessarily….I believe in the afterlife, yes and Heaven and do believe that our loved ones in Heaven get to “visit” us every once in a while. Maybe because I can not imagine Heaven being a place where you would not ever get to see the family you left behind.

I do not believe in the ghosts that go “BOO” and I don’t believe in rituals where you try to reach people who have died….I think that stuff is a little weird.

But something that happened this morning got me thinking…..

Tyler was laying on the floor in the living room and I was changing his diaper, (not an easy task for a one year old) he usually kicks and rolls and screams like crazy because you want him to be still for just one minute…..TORTURE! Anyway, he was being his usually crazy self and then all of a sudden he stopped. He looked up at the ceiling behind me and his eyes lit up and he started to giggle. Then he talked and giggled some more. At first I looked behind me to see if the dog or Jim had come in but there was no one there. So then I found myself saying ” Are you talking to Grandma? Is Grandma here? Well, if Grandma’s here you tell her Mommy misses her very much and she can come visit anytime.” At the time I thought to myself “this should feel weird” but it didn’t. I was smiling when I said it and instead of it feeling weird or making me sad, I actually felt happy.

Looking back on it I tear up, of course, I miss her so much and it makes me so sad that she has never gotten to meet Tyler and that he will never get to know her. She was such an influence on me growing up and she is one of the people who made me who I am today. While it makes me sad that Tyler will not know her the way I did, this morning I realized he may already know her. I truly hope he does because I cannot think of a better guardian angel that my Grandmother.

I cannot believe it will be 4 years this Summer….Rest in peace. We miss you.

“May you know the love of the Angels, deep as the ocean, steadfast as the
stars.”

 

 

 

 

Missing my dear friend….wine!

I am deliriously happy about having a baby but let me tell you being pregnant….though I love it….is…well….different! I never thought it would be difficult…torturous to watch someone drink a glass of wine or a beer and no one better even think of breaking out the tequila bottle in my presence! It’s like with anything else you really didn’t know how much you wanted it until someone said you can’t have it. A lot of people have given me really great advise…like the names of some non-alcoholic wines I could substitute with…nice try! 🙂

No one told me being pregnant is a lot like having your body abducted by aliens. It does things it never did before, craves things I would never eat before and I feel…well….wierd. I lay in bed and there is a bump where my flat stomach used to be. I worry all the time about the little peanut growing inside of me. I wake up at 2:00 a.m. and all I can think about is whether it will have my eyes or Jim’s. Totally crazy. But good crazy. I am obsessed with The Baby Story and find myself watching it obsessively with a blanket easily accessable to cover up my eyes at all the “gross” parts. And to the lady who gave birth in a bathtub and then named her child Poko….Hmmmmm!

So I have decided to embrace the wierdness…I figure this is the one time in my life it’s ok for it to be about me. It’s ok if I really don’t feel like keeping my house spotless (It’s really not ok, it drives me crazy but I’m tired) and it’s ok to ask Jim to make crazy dinners and to eat mint ice cream with chocolate sauce on it every night. It’s not just ok…it’s incredible! And in 7 short months it will be all about the baby!!!! Yeah!

We are counting down the days….

Have a fabulous Monday!

Babies, babies, babies….

Well, the blog is back up and running for now…cross you fingers it stays that way! 🙂

The O’Bryan/Eghigian house has had a lot of excitement in the last month. As most of you already know Jim and I are expecting a baby in November!

As long as I can remember I have wanted a baby. I used to dream of being pregnant and finding out I was going to be a Mom was definitely one of the best days so far! Jim and I started trying to have a baby in January and we had every reason to believe it was going to be difficult for me to get pregnant since I had some medical issues in the past. So when my period ended up being 4 days late and I was falling asleep on the couch every night I just assumed I was getting sick or something. My best friend, Erin kept saying “Just take a test!” I kept saying I wasn’t going to take a test and be disappointed. Finally on Thursday I took the test. I had totally convinced myself it would be negative so when I turned around and saw that plus sign staring at me I lost it. I was laughing and crying and shaking. When I came out of the bathroom everyone thought I was losing my mind. (Not such a crazy assumption)

I was so excited to tell Jim, excited and terrified. Even though we had been trying I was a little scared of his reaction. It’s such a life changing thing. Even from the very beginning. I should have known I had no reason to worry. I wrapped up a onesie that said O’Bryan and the pregnancy test in a gift bag and the look on his face when he pulled out the onesie kept me smiling for days.

We are so excited about this baby. I wake up every morning and remind myself that I really am pregnant and we really are going to be parents. There are a lot of adjustments….turning down that glass of our favorite wine is still taking some getting used to.

Like every newly pregnant for the first time woman, I am reading everything I can about pregnancy and babies. We (and everyone else) are buying onesies and adorable clothes. We cannot wait to find out if it’s a boy or a girl ( in July) so we can start decorating the nursery. I always thought I would not be one of those women who could only talk about pregnancy and babies turns out I am! 🙂 And you know what? I’m going to enjoy every second.

Have a fabulous Monday!

What do I know about the Super Bowl??

What do I know about football? The answer? Nothing! Really, nothing! To me it’s a bunch of men acting like because they are playing football tackling each other and smacking each other on the butt is perfectly appropriate. Every single Sunday from the time football starts until the Super Bowl Jim attempts to explain to me the game of football. I stare at him with that blank face that says “all I am hearing is wha wha wha“.

Do you know what I LOVE about football????? At least two days a week where I can sit on the couch reading and NO ONE bothers me! Usually on Sundays I make something special, like chicken and noodles or baked potato soup and Jim watches football and I read my book…occasionally Jim yells at the TV and I remind him the players cannot actually hear him. I love those days and miss them when football is over!

Another thing I love about football…..the SUPER BOWL! And this year it’s gonna be a good one! We are having our first Super Bowl party! Jim’s two best friends since grade school, Jason and Joe are coming, Jim’s sister Becky and our friends Will and Julie! YEAH! I wish the Super Bowl was on a Saturday or the Monday after was a national holiday because with all those fun people in my house there is bound to be some alcohol consumed. I love any reason to have a party! I am soooo excited!

I hope everyone has fun plans for the Super Bowl….even if you don’t like football it’s a great excuse for great people, great food, and to be hung over Monday morning!

Have a FABULOUS Friday!